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The House Bunny: Awkward Humor Wrapped in Pink Spandex

OK, that time I am sure something just touched my butt.

Searching for the right words to start this review made me feel as dumb as the main character in this movie acts. The House Bunny is a low-ball comedy pegged deep in a summer filled with high concept humor, but does it succeed as a welcome break? Yes, but just barely.

Anna Faris stars in the movie as Shelley, a Playboy Playmate seemingly past her prime, who is unceremoniously booted from Hef’s paradise. In her search for work in a world which is wildly beyond her understanding, she stumbles into a sorority house on the verge of losing its charter because no one, and I mean absolutely no one, wants to hang out with the girls who live there. Shelley sees an opportunity to bedazzle and befriend these girls, turning them into the popular chicks on campus, while the girls see Shelley as the last ditch effort to save their house. Sweatshirts turn to hot pants, frizzy turns to fabulous and piercings turn to pedicures. But, in an effort to keep some sort of moral along the way, both sides learn what it really means to be a family and how much value should be placed on what other people think of you.

So there you have the basic idea, which is nothing terribly new. Beat for beat The House Bunny could be superimposed over other recent college romps as Accepted and Sydney White (the latter being a modern day re-telling of the fairy tale, Snow White). Not to say it doesn’t bring anything new to the table. The supremely odd characters created inside the sorority are worth a look, if not a shudder. Anna Faris does what she does best, play people so mentally vacant, so completely oblivious that the sheer fact they can remember to breathe on their own is a gold medal worthy accomplishment (like the Olympics reference? they’re everywhere!!!). In reality Anna is extremely intelligent and knows exactly what she is doing to keep her career moving along, in fact, she was an executive producer on this movie and I wouldn’t be surprised to see her taking the reins even more in the future. From her first big pop on screen in the original Scary Movie, it was easy to see there was more to her than a beaming smile and big, pretty eyes. She plays her roles with a fearlessness most actors can only strive for. The biggest benefit to The House Bunny is her co-stars seem equally trained and willing to look as blatantly stupid as needed. Emma Stone, whom I just reviewed in The Rocker, brings on one of the most uncontrollably awkward characters in the film and alongside Anna delivers the hands down funniest scene in the picture. As hardcore as she looked in her last film, she’s totally replaced it with social ineptitude on a magical level. Also helping to form out the rowdy bunch of misfits is Kat Dennings as their resident pierced, hoodie shielded, man-hater. Kat makes the shift through the film to uber-hottie a little too easily, but I think it was more due to not enough time to devote to her character, not the fault of the actress (who can also be seen co-starring in the upcoming Nick and Nora’s Infinite Playlist alongside comedy wunderkid Michael Cera). Finally, slipping in between the cracks in the credits, is Rumer Willis, daughter of action icon Bruce Willis. She also succeeds in being socially unfit due to her wearing a upper body metallic brace, possibly fashioned from some Victorian suit of armor. The main downside for Rumer is once the brace disappears, so does her character. Deserving a special mention is Dana Goodman, who plays Carrie Mae, a painfully funny mix of a lumberjack, a greco-roman wrestler, with a topping of Jim Carrey . They made no attempt to explain how someone so odd could exist, but we really didn’t need one.

Although the movie does level out and take on a level of charm, the opening thirty minutes are filled with some of the most painful and uncomfortable awkwardness I’ve been exposed to in a long time. It was there to serve the story and prove how socially oblivious these girls were, but the movie took it to such a level where I almost felt bad for laughing. Most of the opening gags were met with uneasy groans from the audience instead of chuckles and laughs of understanding. Once the girls make the switch from freak shows to femme fatales, the movie finds a much more familiar rhythm and plays that tune until the final credits. Another fault is the misuse in the cast of Kiely Williams and Kimberly Makkouk. Kiely plays Lilly, a mute girl who sends most of dialogue through text messages to the other girls. Her first appearance in the movie comes out of nowhere, or I suppose more literally she dives out of locked room off screen, but her initial outfit is terribly reminiscent of something the maid would wear in Gone With the Wind. The only reason this is worth mentioning is Kiely is the only African American actor in the movie. I’m not saying it was intentionally racist, just saying the wardrobe person took a nap through 400 years of her American History class. As for Kimberly, she plays Tanya, who has a whopping handful of lines in the whole movie and is only part of the outcast crew because she’s tiny, somewhere near dwarf status. While some people might find the few height jokes in the flick worthwhile, it just wasn’t enough to make her character necessary in the least.

I couldn’t possibly write about this without bringing up the continuing trend of casting musicians in feature films. In the role of Harmony, the pregnant member of the house, is Katherine McPhee, American Idol runner-up in Season 5. She does have an amazing voice, which is used in the ending credits and a cringe worthy karaoke scene early on, but she also got tons of notice due to her flawless looks. That imagery only continues in The House Bunny because even nine months pregnant it’s hard to believe college guys wouldn’t be tossing themselves in her path. Adding one more to the musical mix is Tyson Ritter, the lead singer of All-American Rejects. He does a turn as Colby, the long time super-crush of Emma Stone’s character. Not enough really there to say whether he’s a good actor or not, but honestly the character wasn’t cool enough either to make us understand why Emma liked him so much.

Recommendation: It’s a silly comedy that does earn some stripes in the latter half, but be prepared to ache with awkwardness throughout the opening scenes. Uncomfortability is the name of the game here. If you’re down for that, feel free to check it out, but you can honestly wait until video.

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Death Race: Updated, Not Improved.

The reason I am the only thing in focus here is sheer power of the “stare”. Don’t try it at home.

There has always been a trend in Hollywood to go back and remake classics, but the term “classics” is loosely defined between critically acclaimed movies and those which we just have a hell of time watching over and over again, sometimes re-coined as “cult classics”. Fans of both good and bad films raise their respective hands in horror and disbelief everytime another remake is greenlit, while others furrow their brows in confusion as to what inner voices compelled movie execs to take on that particular film update. So here we are again, witnessing the results of nervous hands reaching back into the annals of film history for something to bring back, something to put new wrapping paper on and re-gift to a whole new audience. Happy Birthday, Movie Fans; It’s Death Race!

The original film, Death Race 2000, was produced by legendary film icon Roger Corman, who also acted as one of the producers for the update as well. It was yet one more notch in the belt of an already stellar B-movie career, which included gems like The Little Shop of Horrors, Dementia 13 and Big Bad Mama. Another tidbit the former Death Race had on it’s side was the performances of Sylvester Stallone and David Carradine as Machine Gun Joe and Frankenstein respectively. Both were big names already, with Stallone only one year away from the stardom of Rocky, and these two actors lend a huge amount of camp value to digging through the DVD rental racks just to discover this timeless story of pre-eminent road rage. You might be thinking to yourself, without those two actors, how can this remake hold up? Well, the answer is simple, find a younger actor who can seemingly play absolutely any character with a car and a bad attitude: Jason Statham.

For those who have been living under a rock for the past ten years, Jason Statham is one of the most under-appreciated action stars of our generation. Launching himself to critical appeal in Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels in 1998 he cemented his career moving forward by getting cast as the kung-fu thrilling, one liner spouting and impossibly percise driving lead in The Transporter. His trail through the movie ranks has been a tad wobbly at times, like his starring role in Uwe Boll’s In the Name of the King, but no one can fault him for striking while the iron is hot. Statham continues his streak in this flick with a heap of glaring shots through broken windshields and stare down moments after taking unbelievable punches and kicks to the head. The only piece missing for the true Statham fan is a distinct lack of martial arts, which makes sense on the story side of things, but I still wished for one good spin kick, ridgehand chop to the neck or even better, a homage to the greased pig fight ala Transporter style.

Surrounding our steely-eyed hero are a couple of people worth mentioning. Ian McShane, who is most recently known for mercilessly killing and beating people down in the Old West town of Deadwood, plays Coach, the institutionalized leader of Statham’s pit crew. Tyrese Gibson brings his own version of the stone cold glare over to play as the new Machine Gun Joe, which for one reason or another the new writers decided to make gay. Joan Allen takes a striking departure from her usual fare and turns in a stereotyped performance as the fiendishly powerful warden of the futuristic prison where the Death Race takes place. To get a literary glimpse into her role, picture her performance as Pam Landy from the last two Bourne films and turn the bitchiness up three more notches. Lastly, rounding out the cast, as well as her wardrobe, is the film debut of the dangerously curvy Natalie Martinez as Case, the navigator in Statham’s rolling wagon of destruction. The eye candy in this flick just got a little spicy.

The movie gives you exactly what you expect, fast cars, loud guns and explosions one after another. There are a few really impressive stunt sequences and the realism of the shots seemingly prompted the studio to put up a disclaimer at the end of the film to make sure people don’t go home that night and try to mount mini-cannons on the hood of their Honda Civic. One of the main things I can attack about this flick is not the movie itself, but the trailer. The first trailer to hit the screens was way too long and showed each and every plot twist. Admittedly, you don’t sit down for this with popcorn in hand expecting to be dazzled by well written story elements, but at least give the movie a chance to hit on all cylinders (oh hell yes, car references get me bonus points in this one).

Recommendation: It’s not bad for the die-hard Jason Statham fans and road rage enthusiasts, but for the genre it lands in, I might lean towards the recent decapitation-fest Doomsday. The theater experience is only going to help this one out, so hit up a matinée if you’re feeling the fire for it.

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The Rocker: Comedy Rhythms with Heart

There it is, the first Papa Gino’s I ever ate at. Your first spaghetti basket will change your life.

This summer we have seen everything in the realm of comedy from forty-year-old children and weed fueled action heroes to bumbling super spies and blackfaced primadonnas. It has truly been the summer of high concept, but the audiences are just about ripe for something solid, something familiar and something just under the radar. Who knew it would come in the form of Dwight from The Office?

The Rocker follows the dream which never quite came true for our main character, Fish. He was the drummer in a band, but in order to rocket their career to unheard of levels, they had to drop him. Drop they did, and Fish dwindles into obscurity and ambivalence towards life itself. Twenty years later the universe smiles on him once more and he gets the chance to play drums in his nephew’s band. Through a series of pop culture twists and turns the band ends up becoming an overnight sensation and Fish runs wild through the fields of his waking dreams, while learning the lessons of what it really takes to be the member of a band, not a one man show. Of course, he is not the only one learning lessons, but he’s the main dude on the poster, you know how it goes.

Getting myself comfy in the cushioned theater chair, I was fully expecting a slapstick style, overgrown childhood movie with Rainn Wilson taking charge of the blundering and buffoonery, but what flickered on the screen in front of me was much more than prop jokes and prat falls. The Rocker sneaks by the chuckles and laughter and weasels into your heart with a subtly touching story and some really soft moments. Rainn does get hit by numerous objects and suffers more than his share of bodily harm, but he also never wavers from believing his dream is right and true, not some childhood fantasy. The more subtle comedic moments are left to Josh Gad, who plays his socially awkward nephew/keyboard player. Josh delivers more than a few times and his style felt oddly akin to Dan Fogler ala Balls of Fury, a kind of straight line delivery for a ludicrous line on the page. Rounding out the bandmates are Emma Stone and Teddy Geiger. Emma personifies the “i-hate-everyone-but-the-people-in-this-band” chick, while Teddy has no problem with his sensitive, soulful lead singer persona. For those who don’t already know, this is a touch into the area of typecasting since Teddy Geiger already has a wildly popular album called Underage Thinking and he lent his pop music talents to almost all the original music in the movie. Since they were able to write songs from the characters perspective and not just layer in current pop tracks, The Rocker tips gently into the genre of musical, because the songs actually investigate the emotional state of the characters and move the story along. Also, while Teddy is selling movie tickets and soundtracks, Emma Stone is doing what few actors, especially at the young age of twenty, get to do; open two movies in the same week! The Rocker beat it to the punch, but The House Bunny opens this coming Friday and Emma co-stars in that alongside and Anna Faris and Rumor Willis. It’s a one-two punch for the young ingenue who last charmed people as the girl of Seth’s dreams in Superbad.

Lending a hand to the laugh level were a number of cameos and side characters. Jason Sudeikis from SNL drops by to play the slimiest of record label agents in recent movie history. There are moments you want to punch him, but then you wonder what might get on your hands and if it would wash off later. Christina Applegate plays Teddy Geiger’s mom and tries to balance out the adult-to-child ratio in the mix. She does a decent job and has some truly biting lines (rebutting being called a MILF by replying with calling the man a PILS, you’ll have to see it to get the definition, but I think my best friend will be using it for the rest of her life). Demetri Martin also shows up as the epitome of pretentious, film school drop out, ultra hipster music video directors and it gave me a medium level of anxiety just imagining being on a set with a character like that.

This was honestly the last movie I had any inkling would stir any feelings beyond a bubbling chuckle in my belly, but there is a sweetness to the story and an honesty to the message. It all boils down to follow your dreams, no matter the cost. If that message is spoken faithfully, no matter what story you wrap it in, there will be some people in that audience walking out a little lighter in their step, just itching to get home and pull out their old hobbies, guitars, etc. Don’t get me wrong, this is no Rocky, I doubt many people will suddenly become rock stars after seeing this, but they might just get a tiny bit of inspiration from the best place possible; somewhere unexpected.

Recommendation: I was completely surprised by it, but I’m a sucker for a sweet story. Some good comedic moments, but they are outweighed and outnumbered by the more heartfelt ones. If you’re looking for down-and-out comedy, this might no be crude enough for you. Yet, if you want something simple, with a nice rhythm, this could be the right beat for your Saturday afternoon.

p.s. Christina Applegate also holds one of the best honors ever, being mentioned in the P.M. Dawn song, Set Adrift on Memory Bliss. Let’s be honest, where can you possibly go from there?

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Tropic Thunder: Riders on the Storm of Absurdity

One of these things is not like the other, err..well, it is, but it’s not. (hint: one of them is British)

When the whole world is ranting and raving over the dark, brooding charisma of a vigilante crime fighter, where could we possibly turn to finally end the majestic run of the bat? Well, look no further than the most politically incorrect big-budget comedy in years. I guess five weeks of the gloom and doom of Batman finally did get us wondering, “Why so serious?”. Tropic Thunder rolled through the digital clouds this weekend and into theaters nationwide. It barely cleared the opening weekend take of recent R-rated comedic kin, Pineapple Express, but since Tropic Thunder was made for a ton more money people are wandering around claiming it was a letdown. Look, it took the #1 spot away from The Dark Knight, which had held it for five weeks, and claimed the spot for itself. No matter what amount of money it took in, this was still a success in its own right.

But let’s not focus on money, since it is the root of all evil (but I’ve been trained to handle it, so feel free to rid yourself of any and all unnecessary evil and send your spare money to me). The real success story for this film is the writing, the acting and the sheer brilliance of stupidity skipping and frolicking its way through the jungle. Jumping off the launching point with the fake trailers created for the fake actors in the movie, you already know you are in for something different, something that pushes the envelope of political and social commentary and satire. Tropic Thunder takes unabashed shots at Hollywood, not only for its reputation for prima-donna actors and bumbling directors, but also at its own tendency to turn any poignant social commentary into cannon fodder for the Oscar season. Critics want to brand the movie as insensitive to any number of groups, but what they refuse to see is the lambasting of Hollywood and its own culture as the root of the satire.

Intelligent writing will get your foot in the door, but it’s the actors who are going to have to walk through it. Performances from left to right were all above par and some were down right sensational. Robert Downey Jr. got a helping hand from the instant buzz created the moment people heard he was going to play his character in blackface, but once again the satire of the film keeps it from coming off as incredibly racist. Also lending a hand is Brandon T. Jackson, playing his rapper/actor crossover character Alpa Chino, who comically tries his hardest to correct the historic stereotypes Downey uses to embody his African American roots. Dropped into the lap of a less dedicated actor, the blackface would have completely failed and indeed come off as racist, but Downey confidently walks through the film totally unashamed, which allows the audience to feel unashamed at laughing at him. Ben Stiller, who also took the directing helm for this wartime parody, equally dove into the deep end of the pool with his action hero’s level of total obliviousness to the world around him. Feeling a little like the reverse of the situation in Hot Fuzz, where one man was sane and the entire town was mentally inept, Stiller provides a good deal of the less subtle humor. The only negative twitch I had here was the suspension of disbelief is stretched incredibly thin with Stiller. I could buy the totally out-of-touch actor persona, but once dropped in the legit war zone, it’s a little tough to buy Stiller continuing to live in his action film dream world. Jack Black comes through in the end of the film with his physical comedy king character, but he felt wildly underused for most of the film. Surprisingly, driving the plot and the story along was Jay Baruchel, who was the only mentally stable person in the entire film and he turned in a great performance.

Peeking around the corner of the frame, the cameos in the film are almost overwhelming. Steve Coogan, who should have had a much bigger role, was relegated to mere minutes of screen time, yet he made the most of them. Matthew McConaughey helps paint Hollywood agents in their bleakest light to date, while Bill Hader appears under the veil of the lowly studio-head assistant. Danny McBride, who is having the year of his life right now, steals scenes left and right as the pyrotechnics expert alongside Nick Nolte as the grizzled true life persona of Ben Stiller’s lead role. Saving the most notable cameo for last, Tom Cruise makes a triumphant return to the big screen as an overweight, unbelievably hairy, booty smackin’, cuss tossing Hollywood Studio exec. The hidden genius in this role is every moment he is talking smack about over-pampered actors and how they need to be treated, you know he’s poking fun at himself. Word on the street is Tom recently dropped out of his next action/spy thriller in turn for another comedy after hearing the positive buzz about his Tropic turn. If his career makes a dramatic upturn in the coming months, Tom honestly owes Ben Stiller a crisp million dollar check.

Topping off the whole experience is the great cinematography from John Toll and a wonderfully worked soundtrack, which brings the audience back to the time of epic war movies, but equally reminds us we are watching a send up of that very time period. I can’t say this is going to take in tons of money since the humor might be missed by people not familiar with the inner workings and insanity of the entertainment industry, but I hope there is enough kicks to the balls and fart jokes to keep the rest of the world happy.

Recommendation: It’s worth a look see. Save a couple bucks with the matinée ticket if you can, but check it out in the theater. The jungle, the explosions, the ridiculous trailers all work better in that environment.

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Dakota Skye: The Whole Truth and Nothing But

“Do you know someone named Godot? No? Damn…”

There are few times as a movie watcher when you get to be there at the beginning. By the time a directors name gets tossed into the open arena of critics and fans alike, they have already created a handful of theatrical visions and you find yourself scouring Netflix or Blockbuster trying to walk backwards through their cinematic resume. Well, this is one of those few times where you can say you were there when. In a small number of years you can act snobby at parties and brag about how you saw this feature length debut years before anyone knew about the following successes. What’s better than having intellectual ammo at the ready to feel superior about? Not much.

Let’s talk about the movie first, before we get into the behind the scenes masterminds. Dakota Skye is a superhero tale with a twist. Dakota is a young girl, only medium cute (a line from the movie, which is terribly inaccurate) and she has a secret power. No one can lie to her. Anytime someone distorts the truth around her, their real meaning and honest thoughts appear in front of her like subtitles in a foreign film. You might think this would be a great power to have, but once you start realizing how much people lie and what they really feel about you, life can seem pretty bleak. This is where Jonah comes in, a pleasant tinged stoner who seemingly never tells a lie. Meeting Jonah throws Dakota’s world into a spin because there are only two answers, either her powers don’t work on him or he really is the last honest person on Earth. Let the teenage confusion and angst begin!

The movie is really centered around the relationship between Dakota and Jonah, which places a large amount of the success on the shoulders of Eileen Boylan (as Dakota) and Ian Nelson (as Jonah). Thankfully both step up to the task. The chemistry on screen helps the audience sink into their world, reminding us about that time when we met the first person who got underneath all our walls and social defenses. Eileen shuffles her scuffed jeans and worn-in Chucks through a performance balanced between one part slacker, one part dreamer and one part trail blazer. Top off with a dash of jaded teenager forced to grow up too fast and you have the incarnation of Dakota. Her adorable presence on screen and earnest moments really center the film and keep the audience tuned in. Coming in to lend his assistance is Ian with a humble smile, honest face and almost effortless delivery. Certain scenes for him felt so natural it could have been mistaken for improv, just letting him go and feel the moment as it happened. You can expect to see both of these young actors in the coming years, that is, if you haven’t already caught Eileen in Greek and Making Change and Ian in Bratz and True Confessions of a Hollywood Starlet.

Now both of those performances would not have been possible if not for the delicate touch of director John Humber. This is his first feature film and I can guarantee it won’t be his last to reach the silver screen. Dakota Skye has the feel and rough edges of a debut filmmaker, but there is a vision, a concept and a level of skill that cannot be denied. The whole story is visually told with delicate pacing, filled with engaging moments, leading up to a beautifully touching final scene right out of any major motion picture we see today (specifically in the romance genre, that is). If this is the beginning of a career, all I can say is I am excited to see what’s coming down the line.

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The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2: Weaving the Fabric of Friendship

“If we all just agree not to stare at the weird bumpy thing at our feet, maybe it will go away.”

I know, I know. This is probably the last movie anyone expected to find reviewed on this blog, but the people who really know me can attest to the fact that I am a movie junkie. I will see virtually anything and the ones I might not see by myself, I will easily go along if it’s with another person. So lo and behold a night with my best friend and she wants to witness the story of the bedazzled wonder-pants. Far be it for me to deny her that right, even though I had the arguement of not having seen the first movie. Would I be lost? Would I understand the bond of these four young and troubled girls? How would I follow the twists and turns bound to pop up? I guess my years upon years of movie watching was actually just training for this moment. So away we go…

The next chapter in the tale of the denim divas follows them to all corners of the earth, but seperately. Each of the girls leaves for the summer to follow thier own path, their own heart and where it takes them is not always right along side each other. One goes to drama camp to find out her place in the theater might not be behind the curtains at all, while another goes to art school only to find drawing passion and heart can’t be done when the artist has closed hers off. One more girl learns the past is only as far your last conversation with someone you care about, while lastly another finds looking into the future is more frightening when you imagine it alone. Each young woman travels their own road and this story is how they find themselves and each other once again along the way.

After reading all that it might feel like The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 has stuffed way too much into those wildly decorated jeans, but the movie shows itself to be a great example of intelligent and accomplished editing. Each storyline is touched on, taken in and then moved on from with impeccable timing, never overstaying its welcome and never leaving the audience wondering what was going on with the rest of the girls. Everyone is granted a wealth of screen time and that passes on to the viewer a level of visual respect, so we can decide for ourselves which person we want to route for (if not all of them, which in my case, it wasn’t, but I’ll get to that later). Credit is assuredly given to the director, Sanaa Hamri, for her work, but I want to lend a special round of digital applause to the editor, Melissa Kent, for really keeping a well balanced performance intact for everyone involved.

About those performances, let’s take a closer look at the set up and how it differs from the first time these pants made their appearance on the silver screen. We have four young up-and-coming actresses in Alexis Bledel, Blake Lively, Amber Tamblyn and America Ferrera. When the first movie came out Alexis was riding high on the back of Gilmore Girls mania, while Amber had recently enjoyed critical acclaim in her starring turn on Joan of Arcadia (although not the public rating support that usually accompanies such high reviews). This time around, Alexis and Amber have taken a back seat to the Emmy and Golden Globe winning America Ferrera from the critic’s wonder darling, Ugly Betty and the hype/buzz machine powerhouse of Blake Lively and her adolescent hormone extravaganza, Gossip Girl. Behind the scenes the dynamic may have changed, but on screen you would never know how far things had shifted. There is a palpable level of camaraderie between these four young girls, but how far that lasts when the cameras are off is hard to tell. Personally, the two current headliners, Blake and America, stole the show with their respective performances, especially Blake, while Alexis held her own and Amber fell a little flat. Part of Amber’s problem is she has the character with the least reason to support her. For most of the movie she is grumpy, frumpy and bordering on goth. While each of the other girls are stretching and reaching out, Amber’s character is retreating inward, causing a slight disconnect with the rest of the pack. On the other side of the gender line, there are the men in the picture. No teen chick flick is complete without the heartthrob young men to make the girls swoon, but in most stories there are also the jerks and brutish young punks who hurt or disappoint the girls first, which sends them running to the male best friend who they never looked at in that way before, but they see, and so on and so on. In this story I felt a little break in that belief in the world it created because every guy in the film was perfect. They were all total gentlemen, caring, sensitive, bursting with charm, and to top it all off most of them looked they had just walked out of the gym after a 24-hour work out bender (all except for Blake’s dad, which can be excused in this case). The only reason this stood out as a problem for me was they had every guy throwing themselves at their feet, so their only real problem was with themselves, and that makes for very few hurdles to jump over which are not self-imposed.

In the end the movie is enjoyable and the people in the crowd I was a part of all had their share of cheering moments. It’s a chick flick in its purest form, but that doesn’t mean all the boyfriends and best friends out there have to moan and groan when they get dragged to it. The theater experience really doesn’t bring anything special to it, so you guys out there might even be safe until DVD release, but once that comes, you better find yourself a comfy pillow on the couch because you can be sure this will get heavy rotation.

p.s. My friend would be remiss if I didn’t mention her issue with the casting of the male model character in Alexis Bledel’s story arc. Not a bad actor at all, but she got the vibe he (or his character) wasn’t really into Alexis, or her character, or her gender… Oh SNAP! And I would be remiss not to mention that since this is a sequel with no sub-title it will forever be known to me as The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2: Electric Boogaloo.

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Traitor: Walking the thin, tense line.

“Apologize for making fun of my wind-up puppy collection.”

“Not until you apologize for making fun of my pitch for ‘Dumb and Dumber 3: The Dumbest’.”

“…”

In a cinematic climate recently proven to be tired of movies dealing with the current war in the Middle East, a new fighter enters the fray. Traitor attempts to be something different, a story dealing with the conflict in that part of the world, but also dealing with its effects on people of the Muslim faith in the Westernized world as well. On top of that daunting task, it also reaches for the goal of creating tension, action, anxiety and even a little humor in a deeply political thriller. Oh, and did I mention it was from a first-time feature director? Yep, that’s one big slice of pie to cut off. So how did it fare? Let’s start from the surface and work our way in.

If you’re any fan or connoisseur of cinema, you absolutely have to take your hat off to Don Cheadle. The man has a resume going back years and years and nary a miss in the bunch. There are a few stumbles (I’m looking at you, Swordfish), but overall once Don Cheadle is added to the cast, you’re film instantly takes a step up in the quality column. Going all the way back to Colors and his long stint on the highly acclaimed TV show Picket Fences, Don has only continued his trail of solid performances with the Oceans trilogy, Crash and Hotel Rwanda. In Traitor, Don plays a Muslim American who is caught not between his faith and the Western world, but between his faith and others who interpret the same faith differently. This is the real core to much of the fighting in the world today and this film seeks to uncover some of that for audiences which are nearly foreign to the concept of non-Judeo-Christian values being misinterpreted. Don continually resolves himself on screen with what he wants and what he has to do, all while holding the quiet and stoic presence he has come to be known for. It’s no surprise that his performance is filled with intensity and passion, since he is also a producer on the project and helped get it made under the banner of Overture Films. Once again this is a great example of desire and talent coming together with a well written story.

On the directing side, Jeffery Nachmanoff, who is also the writer, pulls visual influences from other character driven crime stories like Traffic and The French Connection. Traitor has a dirty, worn aesthetic which lends a helping hand to the gritty nature of the subject and landscape of the film. Jeffery weaves two stories together, that of our main characters challenges over his faith and the story of the other side, those people with no struggles over faith and how that can be abused by those in positions of religious power. It boils down to a moral tale about making your own choices and following your heart over the decisions and desires of others. It is a successful effort from this first time feature director, but it did have a handful of missteps. First and foremost, there exists a line where creating tension in the audience changes from excitement to uncomfortability and anxiety. We love being scared, we love being tense, hell, that’s how the enitre horror movie genre lives and breathes, but you can’t keep the audience in that physical and emotional state for too long at one time. Breaks, laugh lines, moments to breathe have to be interspersed to give people time to recoup and let the tension out of their muscles. Traitor sways over that line numerous times in the movie, especially during intercut scenes with a number of storylines happening simultaneously. Lastly, (*minor spoiler*) there is a moment where we are shown a number of ordinary Americans doing their daily routines, while in the background plays a news report about racial profiling and the rampant dissolution of civil rights of stereotypical Muslim looking citizens directly after the 9/11 attacks. The music, the visuals and the content was directed to make the audience feel and agree with the impropriety of the racial profiling, yet later on in the film we are shown that every person we saw during that montage was actually a terrorist as well. It went from telling us how we should trust our fellow man to needing to be prepared to fight off our local coffee store employee. (*minor spoiler over*)

Worth mentioning alongside Don Cheadle are the performances of Guy Pearce, who certainly doesn’t get enough screen time in the major studio films, and Said Taghmaoui, who plays Omar, the devout extremist who brings Don Cheadle into the terrorist fold. Both of these actors really helped shape the story and world on each side of Don and allow him to bring his full range to the movie as a whole, instead of just one storyline. Now, worth mentioning on the bad side of the scale, is the intentionally misleading trailer. The trailer makes this movie look like it’s the black version of The Bourne Identity, with car chases, fist fights and intense spy scenarios, but very little of that is actually present. It was only cut that way to entice American audiences who might otherwise not pay money to sit and watch a slow paced, heavily political tension piece, but that is what Traitor really is. Walking out, I was really happy I had seen it, but I definitely resented the trickery from the studio to try and get me hyped for something it didn’t deliver.

Recommendation: If you don’t mind the tension levels, check this out for sure. Oh, and to really freak out your friends with the wealth of your movie knowledge, add this movie whenever you’re talking about films from the mind of comedian Steve Martin. Yeah, they’ll look at you weird, but you’ll know you’re right. Enjoy the glow.

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Pineapple Express: Weed Comedy with a kick…and a punch…and an elbow drop!

“Do you think what they’re doing over there is illegal? I mean, in this state?”

“Man, I’m not even sure if it’s possible.”

Could it be possible the people behind Pineapple Express were so baked they didn’t even realize it got released on Wednesday instead of Friday? Maybe it was supposed to hit last Friday and everyone connected to it just woke up this morning and thought, “Oh crap. Umm…let’s just send it out now.” Or, the least amusing and most likely of the options, they wanted a jump start on opening weekend tallies and figured it might help them unseat the reigning champion, The Dark Knight. Whatever the reason might be, I’m glad for it because it broke up my week nicely.

Walking into the theater I had expectations only to be entertained, nothing more. My gauge was set to something just a little over Step Brothers, but not aiming for Superbad, Knocked Up or Beverly Hills Cop (added that last one in because it is by far one of the best R rated comedies of all time). What I got was something much different. This is more than a stoner film, this is a whole new genre, the stoner-action film. The genius of this is no one really ever broached this area since logic prevailed against it. If you have two stoners as the main characters, you can’t have an action film because they’ll sit around and do nothing the whole time. There was a brief poke into this with the release of Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, but it wasn’t as much action oriented as hijinx filled. The Pineapple Express formula looks something like this: Smoke weed -=> Witness Violence -=> Smoke more weed -=> Cause Violence -=> Smoke even more weed -=> Go on completely ridiculous violent tangent. As odd as that might sound, it worked like a charm. If this had been shot as a wall-to-wall stoner film it would’ve gotten old within the first thirty minutes, but the fight scenes are so absolutely over the top and beyond hilarious it helped create a nice balance of pacing and energy from the movie and for the audience.

In front of the camera playing our two doobie loving heroes are Seth Rogen and James Franco. Rogen is on a streak which can almost not even be fathomed by most in Hollywood. Reaching back to his humble beginnings on the Judd Apatow led TV show, Freaks and Geeks, Seth has gone on to become one of the most powerful forces in today’s comedy world. Along with Apatow, his mentor, they have single-handedly created the resurgence of the raunchy comedy and infused it with enough heart to increase the audience base by double or more. Soon enough, Rogen will be the Kevin Bacon of the comedy world and you won’t be able to connect two movies without finding him or someone that’s worked with him. James Franco on the other hand, not the well known actor in the comedy circles, but he channels a mix of Rory Cochrane (aka Ron Slater) from Dazed and Confused and Jeff Bridges (aka The Dude) from The Big Lebowski. His relaxed facial expressions and foggy stoner logic throughout the film drive the reaction shots in scene after scene. Lastly, rounding out this baked-in trio is Danny McBride as Red, who in the public eye is just coming off his commendable comedy efforts in The Foot Fist Way. Even though Seth is walking tall in the movie world right now, he actually gets outplayed by both James and Danny who each turn in brilliantly toned and tempered performances. Also, watching these three in a fight scene together was one of the top five most hilarious moments this year.

Some people might not realize that Seth Rogen also is the producer or co-writer of a majority of his recent hits. Knocked Up, Superbad and The 40-Year Old Virgin, on top of this new super-stoner flick, have all felt the weight of his pen and his intelligence for storytelling. He’s got a new big screen adaptation of TV’s The Green Hornet coming up and it almost feels a little like Pineapple Express could be a gateway movie for the audiences to begin looking at him as an action/comedy star. He said in a recent interview he was worried about what was going to happen next since he came up with a lot of these movie ideas when he was fifteen and now he’s much older and has to start coming up with entirely new stories. He might be worried about it, but I’m not. Something tells me Rogen and the entire Apatow crew is going to be around for a very long time. The feeling in the theatrical comedy world right now is reminiscent of Saturday Night Live when you get that perfect mix of cast members. Let’s all sit back, pop open our choice of sugary goodness and enjoy the ride while it lasts.

Recommendation: Obviously I enjoyed the film and I would tell you to go ahead and check it out. The theater experience isn’t completely necessary, but I would do it anyway since you won’t have to wait months for the DVD to hit shelves. Plus, there are a few action scenes which can be helped by the big screen and sound. Oh, and for those wondering about the unanswered question, you do not actually have to be stoned to enjoy the movie.

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Passenger: Music for the dark and humorous heart.

Someone told us playing in this tunnel would be “avant-garde”. What a bastard.

Every now and again you are pointed towards something which will shift your day, your mood, maybe your whole life, in a whole new direction. It would be a little presumptuous of me to say this band from Brighton in the UK will do all those things, but I feel safe saying they will at least catch you smiling without knowing it, maybe even reminiscing about another feeling lost so long ago. Either way, there’ll be an affect.

Passenger is a five piece band led by Mike Rosenberg and they slide into the pop/rock scene with a slightly different take on things. The melodies are sweet and the sound is earnest, but if you were to read the lyrics all on their own, you might think something wicked this way comes. The most notable track for the switch hit off their upcoming album, Wicked Man’s Rest, is “Walk You Home”, a upbeat diddy beginning in the world of puppy love and office crushes and ending deep in the shadows and high in the trees of stalkers and obsession. It actually took me a couple listens before I stopped bopping my head to the music and heard the lyric, “I’m the boy with restraining orders”. Can’t say that line pops up a lot in the love songs I usually listen to. Moving forward to a more straight forward track about loneliness and separation, there is “Table for One”, a beautiful ballad which paints not only a simple visual picture, but also an audio landscape to sweep the listener up into its arms. Then, just so we don’t leave out the other side of love affairs, the angry and angst ridden one, there’s “Do What You Like”, a song about letting yourself be played time and time again in the endless hope of winning in the end.

Each of the tracks mentioned above, plus all the others featured on their MySpace page and Official site, have a wonderful sense of purpose, a truth and honesty about feelings and emotions which we often don’t talk about openly. Adding an important extra touch is the humor and levity covering the songs and keeping them from becoming too heavy or melodramatic. Passenger achieves emo-pop power without the black nail polish, eyeliner and social morays.

For those people living in the LA area, Passenger is playing on 8/11 at the Hotel Cafe in downtown Hollywood. It’s a great venue, which I’ve been lucky enough to see them play at once before, and I can think of few better ways to spend a Monday night. Start your work week off right with some happy/sad/clever/infectious live music!

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The Mummy – Tomb of the Dragon Emperor: Open with Extreme Caution

Yep, I have no idea where his front foot is either. It’s mummy magic.

Movies are almost synonymous with one type of food; popcorn. Summertime is equally synonymous with one kind of movie; popcorn cinema. This would be the type of movie where you walk in, sit down with an overly large tub of possibly-buttered delight in your lap and shut the brain off. Just watch the action, be wowed by the explosions and chuckle at the one-liners you would only joke about, but never believe you would actually hear someone say on screen. Now it may sound like I’m mocking these flicks, but I’m not at all, we eat these up with both hands every year and this summer is no different. How do you think Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull made such a ridiculous amount of money? So, tonight I bore witness to another lasting franchise in the candy coated adventure world and it’s new arrival, The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor.

The first two movies were helmed by franchise creator Steven Sommers, but this time the reins were handed over to another Universal Studios master-at-arms, Rob Cohen. Rob is no stranger to the multi-sequeled storyline, but usually he’s at the front of it instead of coming in during round three. He launched such franchises as The Fast and the Furious, xXx and The Skulls. He also directed one of the more stand out martial arts movies of the early 1990′s, Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story. With all those credits on his rap sheet, you’d figure this project would be akin to giving a professional conductor one of Beethoven’s classics, a walk in the park. Yet this stroll down popcorn lane proved to be a more windy road than imagined.

The story takes place many years after the last chapter and Rick and Evie’s son, Alex has taken on the family business of digging up and uncovering the most dangerous of mummified enemies. This new foe happens to be an ancient Chinese emperor who once controlled the five elements and tried to take over the world, which seems to be a bit of a habit for these mummies. Once he is reawakened, the ride begins and we are off once again, racing around the continent to try and stop him from becoming completely immortal. The basic premise works and personally I was glad to move the location out of Egypt, since I felt they had played that tune as long as they could. Yet once you move below the basic storyline, all the connecting points seem to fall apart. I’m a huge supporter in the “willing suspension of disbelief”, which we all need to fully enjoy any movie, but this suspension was pulled just a few hairs past the limit. So many things take place which are never explained, never set up and sometimes never paid off. Once the momentum really got moving, every other scene was spent trying to figure out how we got there and what was going on. It had a little taste of Wanted, which also jumped absolutely huge logic holes for the sake of making something look cool on screen, but that film, under the insane vision of Timur Bekmambetov, pulled it off much better.

As for casting, back in the day this was going to be the bread and butter of Brendan Fraser’s career (who plays our dashing hero and young Indiana Jones homage, Rick O’Connell), but since the first movie I haven’t felt that same magic from his performance. Ever since then it has all felt like a shadow or almost a parody of the moments he created in the original. Also, in the first two he starred alongside Rachel Weisz, but she didn’t return to the sand and savagery this time and the studios were forced to either write her out or replace her. They chose the latter. In comes Maria Bello as Evie O’Connell, the spunky and adventurous librarian-cum-swashbuckler. I think Maria is a fantastic actress and I was wildly supportive of her turn in A History of Violence, but this was not a good fit for her. Her action scenes felt forced and overly silly, on top of her accent sliding in, out and completely off the British continent. From the original chapters, the only person to bring the exact same level, for better or for worse, was John Hannah, as Evie’s charmingly opportunistic brother, Jonathan. New to this series was Michelle Yeoh, an immortal witch hoping to stop the Dragon Emperor, and Jet Li as the Emperor himself. Michelle was fairly strong in her performance, but Jet Li spent most of the movie walking around as an animated Terra Cotta statue, so it’s a little hard to criticize any lack of emotion from the part.

It can be argued that acting skills and story structure have nothing to do with popcorn cinema, it is all about the special effects. We are there for the glitz, the glamor and the wonderment of things we have never seen before on screen. Unfortunately this visual extravaganza didn’t break down any walls in that realm. The statue effect on Jet Li’s character skipped back and forth between impressive and amateurish, while the practical effects and explosions failed to really pop the eyes open of the audience. The one thing standing out amongst the crowd was the Yeti creatures (don’t ask how or why they appeared, just let that one go). These imagined visualizations of the abominable snowmen provided not only some much needed freshness to the flick, but some decent comedy as well. Numerous times there was laughter peeling through the audience, but half of it was laughing alongside the movie, while the rest was laughing at it. Big difference, same result: entertainment. As many problems as this does have, I can’t say I walked out unamused. The plot holes and logic issues leave the script looking like a well used target down at the local gun range, but the jokes were plentiful and they kept coming until you gave in and laughed.

Recommendation: As I’ve said before, this is an action movie, so it can only be helped by seeing it on the big screen, but on this occassion I might just suggest waiting for TV distribution and sitting really, really close to the set.

p.s. I was once again reminded about why I choose to go to the Arclight Cinemas as much as possible. Tonight they gave out posters signed by Rob Cohen to people sitting in random seat numbers. Plus, if that wasn’t enough of a bonus for the night, Rob Cohen himself was there to introduce the movie. He mentioned that he made the movie for us, the fans, the general public, and not for the critics and bloggers (like myself). He said it’s about sheer entrainment, so whether you think it’s good or it’s bad, if you laugh at it during any point, his job is done. For me the job was done, but it might not have been the job he intended.

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